Press Release

Local Racer Aims For Mediocrity

25.05.2014 - MAY 25TH 2014 - In a cold, almost deserted warehouse in the middle of the rural British countryside we met up with racing driver Chris Dewing. Mr. Dewing had spent the majority of the last few months sending us information about himself, his race results, his likes and dislikes, at one point even a very tasty chocolate cake, all with the hope of getting us to run a story about him and his racing career. Due to this being a slow news week we have granted Chris his brief moment in the spotlight.

Born to British parents but raised by a combination of a Bolivian nanny and a well-trained orangutan named Tolodo, Chris Dewing knew he wanted to be a racing driver from a young age. "I wanted to be a racing driver from a young age", said Dewing, "Tolodo always told me "ooh-ah-ah, ah-ah ah-ooh-ah", which I believe means "follow your dreams and get me a banana". I followed my dreams, but I'll be damned if I got him a banana."

Things were not easy for Dewing in a sport where financial support is almost as important as talent. "I spent a lot of time at my local go-karting track in the hopes that someone would see me there and buy me an F3 car. This didn't work too well, the only people who offered me anything were strange looking men offering me candy from their van, but thankfully I sold that candy and it helped get me some more time at the track. I didn't get the F3 car I wanted, but the experience gave me a big understanding about how to drive consistently and kept me focused on my goal."

His driving dream seemed to have stalled, but earlier this year Dewing received the assistance he needed to fund his career as an F3 driver. "My neighbour, Mr. Huntingdon, gave me $500,000 for some reason. The only explanation he gave was for "years of entertainment and pleasure". The only interaction I had with Mr. Huntingdon was waving out the window to him after I'd had a shower, so I have no idea what entertainment I had given him."

Despite the concerning nature of the money it gave Dewing the chance to purchase and race an F3 car in various races and series around the world. Results have been mixed, Dewing has crashed several times, but also performed well in the F3 Rookie Series races. "3rd place in Okayama was a wonderful moment, the best of my life for sure. The race went about as well as I could have hoped and to stand on the podium at the end was an incredible rush. It's a shame I broke the trophy on the way home, but these things happen."

Will Dewing be aiming for greater things in the upcoming season? "Winning is not everything right now. What I'm hoping for is to try and get a better understanding of my car, the tracks, and what is needed to be successful. I'd rather finish 15th than get a pole and crash out on the first lap. Hopefully one day I'll be among the big guns, until then it's a learning experience."

So there we have it. Chris Dewing - racing driver wants to be average. Thanks for reading.